Wild Astrology Weekly – Week of July 12–19, 2025
A week under the influence: planets in retrograde. The Saturday Newsletter.
The Week's Transits
Dates are in CET (Central European Time).
SUNDAY 13/7 – SATURN RETROGRADE
Responsibility is what you preach… but your delivery history says more “when will it be ready?” than “it’s already done.”
Saturn moves backward in Aries: when you want to lead your own life but your biggest accomplishment this week is procrastinating on procrastination.
THURSDAY 17/7 – LAST QUARTER MOON IN ARIES
“Last quarter to let go… or to set fire to what’s left of your patience.”
Cosmic postscript: “No, it’s not ‘renewal energy.’ You’re just literally done.”
FRIDAY 18/7 – MERCURY RETROGRADE
Fluent communication is the plan… epic misunderstandings is the execution.
Mercury retrograde in Leo: when you want to express yourself with solar clarity but end up sending 4-minute voice notes that basically say “I don’t know.”
EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW WITH URANUS IN GEMINI
Journalist: What’s your take on the week ahead?
Uranus: “Look, Saturn retrograde wants everyone to act like responsible adults, but I’m about to hack three routines in the same day. Leadership? Please. I’m inventing horizontal leadership while multitasking across four parallel dimensions.”
Journalist: And the Last Quarter Moon in Aries?
Uranus: “Aries wants to let go by setting things on fire—very linear, very predictable. I’m here to revolutionize ‘letting go’: you’ll release patterns you didn’t even know you had, via instant cosmic download. While you sleep. Plot twist: you’ll wake up a completely different person with the same face.”
Journalist: Does Mercury retrograde affect you?
Uranus: “Mercury retrograde is amateur hour. I’ve been communicating in frequencies that won’t be invented until 2087. While they’re misinterpreting a text, I’m already creating languages that don’t exist yet. Their voice notes say ‘I don’t know’—mine say ‘I don’t know’ in five different languages and from the future.”
Journalist: Any advice for the week?
Uranus: “Advice is a 20th-century concept. I offer disruption. This week you’ll have ideas so random you’ll think you’re having a breakdown, but really you’re upgrading your mental operating system. Welcome to intelligent chaos.”
Journalist: And if people resist change?
Uranus: “Resistance is irrelevant. The change already happened—you just haven’t realized it yet. I’m three moves ahead playing cosmic chess while you’re still wondering if it’s time to move a pawn.”
WHAT THE SIGNS THINK BEFORE FALLING ASLEEP
(with Mercury Rx in Leo)
(art-house version + pop art in static camera)
ARIES
"What if I start again tomorrow? But this time… with no witnesses."
(Long pause. Stares at the ceiling. Decides to dream of scooter chases.)
TAURUS
"The universe has been expanding for over 13 billion years. Why should I rush my breakfast?"
(Smells own pillow. Gets hungry. Doesn’t get up.)
GEMINI
"I don’t regret anything. Or maybe everything. Or something that hasn’t even happened yet."
(Laughs alone. Mentally notes an idea. Loses it in 7 seconds.)
CANCER
"What if that scene I remembered didn’t happen? What if it never happened at all?"
(Covers up to the nose. Pretends not to care. Gets emotional.)
LEO
"I didn’t say everything I felt. But I edited it so well it seemed brilliant."
(Whispers their own name. Like rehearsing for an unauthorized biopic.)
VIRGO
"I didn’t control anything today. The world didn’t explode. Noted."
(Readjusts the blanket 3 times. Finally surrenders to chaos.)
LIBRA
"What if balance is just a form of fear?"
(Turns to the other side of the bed. Thinks about Fellini.)
SCORPIO
"I showed them 12%. That was too much."
(Smiles with guilt. Closes eyes like someone planning an eclipse.)
SAGITTARIUS
"I didn’t explain myself well. But at least I was honest. I think."
(Makes a mental joke. Laughs. Falls asleep just as they were about to cry.)
CAPRICORN
"I set boundaries with such elegance no one noticed."
(Checks imaginary list of accomplishments. Adds: survived another absurd day.)
AQUARIUS
"If I think something radical and no one hears it, is it still revolutionary?"
(Answers yes. But doubts. But yes.)
PISCES
"I remembered that dream inside the dream. The one that felt like my life."
(Dissolves into a movie scene that never existed.)
From my Instagram
TAURUS
“The universe has been expanding for over 13 billion years.
Why should I rush my breakfast?”
Fragment from the Taurus chapter of The Zodiac of the Nouvelle Vague.
Astrology to inhabit your own rhythm—without apologizing.
📘 Full book available [here].
#Taurus #SymbolicAstrology #NouvelleVague #IronicZodiac #NonEvolutiveAstrology #ContemporaryAstrology #PaulaLustemberg #StylishAstrology #SlowBreakfast #SensoryResistance #ZodiacOfTheNouvelleVague
FILM OF THE WEEK
Planetary energy meets cinema.
Mercury retrograde in Leo calls for dramatic revision with vintage flair.
→ All That Jazz (Bob Fosse, 1979)
An artist repeating his mistakes as if they were choreography. Self-destruction with sequins. Inner monologues, frantic editing, and lines that sound like your ego has its own apartment.