Astrology for Frustrated Gods: When the Planets Work in a Call Center
(And How to Unlock Their Potential Without Leaving Your Couch)
1. The Cosmic Tragedy: Gods Trapped in Humans
Picture this:
Mercury (god of communication) dreamed of being a dolphin playing in the sea. In you, he's an accountant who hates Excel and uses emojis in professional emails.
Jupiter (king of expansion) longed to be an eagle soaring through the sky. In your cousin, he's a spiritual coach in debt from OnlyFans.
The Moon (symbol of instinct) wanted to be a wolf howling at the night. In your neighbor, she's a mom watching Big Brother while eating ice cream straight from the tub.
Conclusion: The gods within us are underemployed, undervalued, and ready to quit.
2. Signs a God in Your Chart Is Having a Career Crisis
Your Venus (goddess of love) screams from the underworld every time you say “I just want something casual” but stalk your ex on Instagram.
Your Mars (god of action) cries in the bathroom every time you say “I’ll start the gym tomorrow” for the seventh year in a row.
Your Saturn (lord of karma) sends you overdue bills because you ignored his lessons in 2020.
3. How to Negotiate With Your Inner Gods (Without Expensive Therapy)
🔹 For frustrated Mercury: Write a tweet without editing it 10 times. Let the god play.
🔹 For bored Jupiter: Plan a trip… even if it's just on Google Maps. The eagle needs a horizon.
🔹 For exhausted Moon: Take a guilt-free nap. Even wolves rest.
🚀 EXCLUSIVE FOR PAID SUBSCRIBERS: THE FORBIDDEN MANUAL
Want to know...?
Which planet in your chart is about to sue you for “toxic work environment” (and how to bribe it with chocolate).
The “Saturn Sugar Daddy” technique: How to turn your karma into perks (like turning past mistakes into future discounts).
Why Pluto HATES spiritual influencers (and what to do if he’s in your 10th House).
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👉 I Want to Save My Gods! (A link even Aphrodite would click.)
Thanks Paula